28.11.12

you can borrow my hoe


one time i had a dream that my pet-fish, bubbles, kept offering to loan garden tools to ms. rathangan, a lady from my neighborhood, even though she didn't want them.

one afternoon in late december i was walking to my house. it was around twilight which comes early in that time of the year. people were turning on their xmas lights. ms. rathangan was in her drive way with her binoculars. she saw me coming and walked over. she writes books about falling stars.

she said that my pet fish bubbles is a bit of jerk. i nodded yes, and asked her if he was pestering her with the rhetoric of his end of the world cult. she said that her father had been a politician and was into that sort of thing, so she was used to that. she didn't mind it. she told me that bubbles kept offering to loan her gardening utensils.

bubbles, every time he saw her, would start a conversation. he'd tell her that if she wanted to borrow his rake she could, or if she needed a hoe, she could use his, or if she needed a hose, she could come over and borrow his. last week he put the wheelbarrow at her disposal. then, she said that he always calls her "meggers" instead of just meg, which is her name.

i said that maybe he likes her and wants to ask her on a date.

she giggled at that. she shook her head and said that it wasn't that. bubbles was kind enough, but she really didn't do much gardening in december, since the lawn was covered by snow and the ground was frozen. she just wanted to know if there was a reason why he specifically was obsessed with her lawn, or if he was like that with everyone. i told her that it wasn't just her.

when i asked bubbles about it, he said that he was just trying to be friendly. he asked, rhetorically, why everyone in this neighborhood was so touchy around the holidays.

i reminded him that all the tools he was offering to loan out are actually mine not his. he started to mumble about the evils of property. 

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